Smoke Detektor!!AwZwHkBGWx 2015/10/11(Sun)22:02 No. 676090 ID: cbd4d0
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Ok, you're back at your studio. Your room-mate, Jessica, is not home from work for a few hours, so you have a while to work on some art projects before she gets home and asks you to stop. Unfortunately she also hasn't brought you the green tea you asked for. Not like she'd get the right sort anyway, 'cause she's a basic ass.

You don't really know how to paint or draw that well, but you think the art is more about how you feel. You need to decide what medium you are going to use to make your new artwork. If it's good enough, you might be able to sell it on Etsy and make enough to pay rent this fortnight.

Expect inconsistent artstyle btw

>>676090
Draw something sloppily erotic in 50 shades of grey paint.

Paint military representatives from as many imperialist and colonialist empires as you can think of playing poker with their ill-gotten wealth.

Or overturn a trashcan and call it sculpture.

Smoke Detektor!!AwZwHkBGWx 2015/10/11(Sun)22:24 No. 676099 ID: cbd4d0
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>>676092

You don't have 50 shades of grey paint, but you have one shade of grey shit you found in the cabinet under the kitchen sink.

You paint something, hm, vaguely erotic with it. Unfortunately it runs and drips on the carpet. Shit. You consider photographing the mess on the carpet as an artwork in and of itself, but you don't know where Jessica's camera is.

While you feel the small expression of sexuality is cathartic, not as much as the time you suspended your semen in resin cubes and sold them as necklaces on Etsy for $120

Smoke Detektor!!AwZwHkBGWx 2015/10/11(Sun)22:44 No. 676102 ID: cbd4d0
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>>676096

Rubbish sculpture sounds like a great idea! Who would have thought someone like you could express yourself with smelly refuse?

Smoke Detektor!!AwZwHkBGWx 2015/10/11(Sun)22:44 No. 676103 ID: cbd4d0
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>>676102

DAMN IT! That idiot Jessica must have taken out the rubbish this morning before work, while you were still in bed. Stupid Jessica. You will need to go find garbage somewhere else, because there's not much here at home.

The ultimate art piece would be to rent an empty room, charge $50 for admission, and call it the "Empty Promises of Capitalism."

Trust me, you will score BIG points in the art snot community, and you'll rake in the cash on the side.

Go to a dump. You don't want to get in trouble for going through random people's trash. Again.

>>676103
Is your trash still on the street corner waiting to be picked up? If it is, go get it!

>associate's degree in art theory
Ha ha, associate of the arts. Ha ha ha ha.

Smoke Detektor!!AwZwHkBGWx 2015/10/12(Mon)14:12 No. 676156 ID: 30342d
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>>676104

That's an excellent idea. It would be even better if you took a big shit in the middle of the room, to further represent how "shit" their outlook of life is. Truly, you are an artistic genius.

Smoke Detektor!!AwZwHkBGWx 2015/10/12(Mon)14:12 No. 676157 ID: 30342d
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>>676128
You go to the dump. Perfect! A great source for artistic material, just waiting to be shaped to your vision.

WAT? No scavenging? That's ridiculous! Not like anyone is using it, and you need it! There has to be a way to get it.

>>676157
Cross out the "No" So it just reads "Scavenging". Then go to town.

>>676156
Maybe make it so that every visitor has to take a shit there as well. You know, audience participation and stuff.

Smoke Detektor!!AwZwHkBGWx 2015/10/12(Mon)16:28 No. 676165 ID: 30342d
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>>676163

Great idea! You take a mental note of it, for when you begin this project later on.

>>676158

You alter the sign, so that it in fact encourages scavenging of the rubbish. Perfect!

Smoke Detektor!!AwZwHkBGWx 2015/10/12(Mon)16:29 No. 676166 ID: 30342d
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>>676165

You pick up a bucket and start filling with whatever kind of garbage catches your eye. You get a nice collection, you think this will work out well.


>"Oi, 'scuse me m8."


There is a man wearing a fluoro vest running over to you.

>"Oi m8, I didn't see you pass through the g8. There's no scavengin' allowed here m9. Dumping ONLY, otherwise you're gonna have 2 leave."

>>676166

Inform him of the sign saying otherwise. Then when he looks at the sign, sprint away.

>>676166
He's obviously a fellow artist. Dump the trashcan on his head as an ironic poststructuralist gesture signifying the importance of critique in the modern art world.

I am dissatisfied with zee quality of ze dumping here! I say, it is absolutely *shameful.* I am taking my rubbish and going to a different dump to have it *properly* disposed of.

Smoke Detektor!!AwZwHkBGWx 2015/10/13(Tue)15:37 No. 676283 ID: 71da1e
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>>676275

You put on a convincing French accent (since you studied it for a semester in high school, you're practically fluent).

"I'm sorry, but I am dissatisfied with ze qualitie of ze domp site hiere ! I am taking my garbage elsewair !"

The man looks confused.

>"Urhm, well alright then?"

You take this opportunity to escape with the valuables. Ha! Joke's on you, council! This garbage is yours, and no daft worker or misleading sign will get in your way!

Smoke Detektor!!AwZwHkBGWx 2015/10/13(Tue)15:38 No. 676284 ID: 71da1e
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>>676283

You get home with the garbage.

Since you have other projects going on in your room, you temporarily dump the rubbish on Jessica's bed. A fitting place, really considering that it's used to holding Jessica, and the trashy, uncultured men she brings home on Friday nights.

The garbage smells really bad, and it's leaking some gross liquid onto the sheets. Luckily you didn't put it on your own bed after all. Ew!

Now you need to decide what you're going to do with it.

>>676284
A touching tribute to your favorite digital media creation, Eadoo Quest

>>676284
You could turn the bed into a installation, but that's a bit overdone

>>676284
Is lighting it on fire too passé? Art, like life, is so fragile and impermanent, after all.

The garbage needs time to fester before your creation can begin. Go reward yourself with some goat cheese for your diligent work in the meantime

>>676284
Do with it? That looks done to me. Put the bed up on etsy. Jessica can sleep on the floor like the dog she is.

You know what go ahead and take a shit on the bed and call it "A Culture of Plenty."