rolled 4 = 4

---

EXECUTING CentiMinionSpawn(Random.Range(1,6));

rolled 30 = 30

---

// 85% chance now, rip
float dustExplosion = 40
if(Roll <= 45+dustExplosion) transform(false);

rolled 93 = 93

---

if(Roll <= 50) collateralDamage();

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/12(Thu)16:41 No. 1053687 ID: 87e33c
File 167357051177.png - (15.35KB , 500x500 , p152.png )

> MINIBOSS - THE FALSE RIGHT QUEEN [FRQ] AND HER MINIONS
You back several steps away from the [FRQ], her eggs, and her minions. In an attempt to distract and gauge out the senses of the beasts you reduce your weight and scatter your nanobots across the massive chamber. The nanobots rub against each other, vibrate, and attempt to create as much noise as possible as you observe your foes' responses.

The queen pays your distraction attempts no heed, focusing on her brood and coating more eggs in that weird goop. You can see a change occurring in FOUR of them. But you've got a little time before they hatch.
The CENTIMINIONS on the other hand are slightly affected. Three of things follow your staples, leaving you to only contend with two of them. It only takes the laziest of kicks for you to send the fastest one to its death as it is impaled on a nearby stalagmite. The second one stupidly dashes at you, so you grow a bit larger and open your maw.

The stupid beast clambers forward disregarding its life as you swallow its head whole. If you had to describe the taste, their flesh would be somewhere in between a prawn and a salted ant, whereas the carapace tastes somewhat like a dusty eggshell.

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/12(Thu)16:42 No. 1053688 ID: 87e33c
File 167357052316.png - (13.18KB , 500x500 , p153.png )

> MINIBOSS - [FRQ] AND HER MINIONS
You return to the FLOODLIGHT and GENERATOR that you are using to brighten the room, giving them a once over with your FLASHLIGHT. It's a moderately sized crank generator with a small diesel backup. You take a quick look around the chamber you were in previously, see the statues, which you now recognize as bodies completely siphoned of life, a few discarded crates and several upturned minecarts you missed. You don't register the contents of the cart, upturned on the floor as you hyperfocus on the generator and your flashlight.

You: Hope this dinky little flashlight is good enough to see in the dark…
You: This GENERATOR oughta give a big enough boom though…

You mount the flashlight on your shoulder with the nanobots that were connecting the generator to the floodlights, causing the place to grow dark again. You pick up the generator and shift your size until it is comfortable to throw. The remaining Centiminions are following your staples around, gnashing madly at them as you move them right into your expected blast radius. The [FRQ] finishes hatching FOUR new Centiminions as well, who seem equally distracted by your nanobots.

And then you throw the generator.

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/12(Thu)16:42 No. 1053689 ID: 87e33c
File 167357054096.png - (13.76KB , 500x500 , p154.png )

> MINIBOSS - [FRQ] AND HER MINIONS
Kin, in the past, have pointed out that you're not very smart. You would have agreed with this point of view in the past, but now you have superpowers and feel that your memory has drastically improved. In the split-second moment just as you trigger the detonation of the generator you realize several things.

The Government would probably want to study the sludge and get as many eggs as possible. The bodies look siphoned by some kind of stinger that you haven't seen the Kaiju in this cave use yet. This cave probably contains some sort of SECRET related to summoning Kaiju and finding your way to Paradiso. Oh, and those upturned minecarts looked to be at least half-filled with coal dust.

You: Uh oh.

You dash forward, exposing yourself from any form of cover, attempting to undo what is potentially going to be a major delay in actually solving the Kaiju problem, but it's too late. The reaction is triggered and the detonation has occurred. The explosion is light at first, a pop, a fizzle, and a small orange bloom. And then the dust that fills the cavern comes alight. You watch in slow motion as a dust explosion licks the cavern walls, spreading out in a circle and hitting everything.

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/12(Thu)16:42 No. 1053690 ID: 87e33c
File 167357055074.png - (17.05KB , 500x500 , p155 (1).png )

> MINIBOSS - [FRQ] AND HER MINIONS
You are knocked back, your body scraping against the sharp cavern floor. You watch as your transformation fades, the force of the blast too much for you to handle. 3 Centiminions are fried by this fire due to their dangerously exposed undersides. They curl up into delicious smelling balls. The queen, completely caught off guard, was unable to protect 3 eggs, leaving 5 unhatched ones intact. Unfortunately the [FRQ] and recently spawned 4 Centiminions took no damage, but each does look somewhat disoriented.

And then there's the rest of the room. What catches your eye first is that some of the statue-like bodies are scattered about, and on fire. Pieces of abandoned debris, piles of centipede feces, and upturned minecarts along the edges of the cave, barely out of sight, are set aflame, helping to brighten the room. Miraculously, none of the wall markings were damaged and the cave's still intact! You'd let out a held breath of relief if you weren't winded when you were smacked against the floor.

YOUR FOES ARE STUNNED
- The Centi-minions and [FRQ] will not act this update
- You are currently de-transformed and are WEAKER than normal
- You will automatically transform at the end of the update, not before then

A. EGGNAPPING
- Steal an egg and hide it
- Will guarantee at least one intact egg by this mission's end
B. MINION CRUNCHING
- Get rid of the minions, lowering the success chance of the [FRQ]'s retaliatory actions
- Kill or KO the 4 remaining Centiminions (your choice)
C. OTHER
- Do something else, you CANNOT land a FINISHING BLOW untransformed
- STATS: https://questden.org/wiki/Tension_Stats

KO the remaining Centiminions. That gives you a sample and improved chances.

B

>>1053690
>You will automatically transform at the end of the update, not before then
Hopefully we'll finally roll higher than a 2!

>what do?
B
We need to kill off the minions so that our enemy has a lower chance of being able to do something to us!

Grow bigger and start ripping the minions apart and slamming them into each other! Pick up 2 minecarts and hold them in your hands to use them like boxing gloves!

I'll probably pick later since right now I'm fine with either choice

but one thing I will suggest: apologize to the dice for threatening it earlier, and ask it politely to not roll a 1 or 2, and give it a kiss for good luck. (not that it will do anything, but the thought is funny

If B is chosen, I'd say only KO them. Getting exp for eating them is good and all, but the government was not happy with us splitting up with our guards, so it's probably important to ko them for them to capture and research to make the fallout from our misconduct less painful

>>1053690
>3 Centiminions are fried by this fire due to their dangerously exposed undersides. They curl up into delicious smelling balls.
You can snack on them later, after you deal with the current threats!

You may not be transformed, but you're also not completely powerless! Get back in the fight!

>vote
Go for B. You need to reduce the queen's helpers as much as possible!

I wish i thought of this sooner, and i might be too late to suggest it, but i have another idea

Is it possible to call Pazuru and let her have one of the bodies that aren't burning while the Kaiji are stunned? If possible, i'll go for C, let Pazuru have one of the lifeless bodies of her choice. That way, she can fight the minions, and we can fight the queen.

If it's not possible, then nevermind, and stick with B while KOing the minions

>>1053744
>let Pazuru have one of the bodies
Didn’t Pazuru specifically tell us that she wants a body that’s got cat like features? I’m pretty sure she’s not going to want any of these insect kaiju bodies.

>>1053750

I was talking about these bodies: >>1053175
and look! one of them is a cat

>>1053756
Dude... it's not hard to see that they're literally impaled! Even IF Pazuru decides to take one of those bodies, she's going to instantly get killed because she'll have a giant kaiju stinger impaled to her heart.

Oh, Sorry about that. Yeah, those were some good points. I guess I was hoping that wouldn't matter because of magic healing the body in the process of Pazuru taking the body or something, but I'll drop it.

But maybe after the mission, we can see about salvaging one of these bodies for Pazuru after we get some of the government researchers or doctors to patch the body up of their injuries for her to use?

>>1053690
B

Let's knock out the minions. Grab some debris and start whacking them!

>>1053759
>salvage stoned bodies
>government can fix them
I don't think government science can fix bodies being turned to stone.

rolled 2 = 2

---

*smooches you*
Tension Plz!!!

EDMNGO - ID:0838d6 2023/01/15(Sun)17:17 No. 1053855 ID: 38349b
File 167383184739.png - (16.27KB , 500x500 , p156.png )

> MINIBOSS - [FRQ] AND HER MINIONS
You get up off the ground, scuffed, but otherwise fine. Ready to transform again you toss the dice, only to discover that it doesn't work. You start to panic before grabbing the dice again and watching it slowly pulse with energy.

You: It takes an [UPDATE] to charge??!?!?
You: At least they're stunned...

You fix your eyes on the Centiminions and dash forward, 3 meters may not be enough to rival the FALSE RIGHT QUEEN, but it's certainly enough to rival the Centiminions. Their movements are sluggish and poor, they're probably CONCUSSED from the explosion, so you dodge, duck, and weave around their flailings before beating them with upturned minecarts. Some cracks form in the carapaces of the ones you do hit, but since you cut open the big one, you've got a good idea of where their nerve clusters are.

You target the weakest point and incapacitate all of the Centiminions, just as the FALSE RIGHT QUEEN's stun wears off.

EDMNGO - ID:0838d6 2023/01/15(Sun)17:17 No. 1053856 ID: 38349b
File 167383186594.png - (14.52KB , 500x500 , p157.png )

> MINIBOSS - [FRQ] AND HER MINIONS
The false queen flicks her antennae in your direction before looking around wildly, seeming confused at the lack of Centiminion followers. She lets out several shrill "shrieks", four short ones, a pause, a short one and a long one. You feel like it's almost communicating disdain towards you, but shrug it off, thinking you must be imagining it.

You: Alright, no messing around!
You: TENSHIN!

You pull out your Ruby D8 and kiss it, muttering a small apology for yelling at it earlier before letting it loose and rolling another 2. You briefly wonder if the universe and RNG are mad at you for some reason as your transformation returns.

You: COME THE FUCK ON!!!!
You: THREE 2s IN A ROW?!?!?!?
You: Okay, there was the one 1 in there, but STILL!!!!
You: I hope the other team is doing well...

LOW ROLL PENALTY HAS BEEN TRIGGERED!
- Taking damage will cause you to waste an update transforming again
- You can choose to fight with your de-transformed capabilities if you want, but will be limited in power
- You can also choose to waste an update de-transforming and transforming again

EDMNGO - ID:0838d6 2023/01/15(Sun)17:17 No. 1053857 ID: 38349b
File 167383187646.png - (16.90KB , 500x500 , p158.png )

> MINIBOSS - [FRQ] AND HER MINIONS
You think that if Josephine's timeline was accurate then they should be done fighting the Kaiju in ACTIVITY ARCADIA, but talking to them right now might risk taking a hit and letting this thing spawn even more minions.

You think deeply about this moment, about the dice, about the [CHAOS] of this situation and about the [TENSION] being built. You're incredibly glad that these things didn't escape, but if things keep ramping up like this, you're not sure what the future is going to be like. Especially if you keep being so darn unlucky!!!!!!!!

You: Seriously, what the fuck dice...

NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO
- A random number of CENTIMINIONS will spawn [Up to 5], until no eggs remain
- 5 unhatched eggs remain
- 0 hatched Centiminions are on the battlefield

A. CALL FOR BACKUP
- Fight while distracted as you call for backup
- Backup will arrive in between [1 and 3 UPDATES] later
- 20% Chance of taking [1 HEALTH] in damage, losing your transformation, and forcing you to fight for one update in a weakened state
B. CRACK THE SHELL
- Assault the toughened carapace of the FALSE RIGHT QUEEN
- 65% chance of making your foe vulnerable to a killing blow
- 30% Chance of taking [1 HEALTH] in damage, losing your transformation, and forcing you to fight for one update in a weakened state
C. [OTHER]
- Do or prepare another action
- 20% Chance of taking [1 HEALTH] in damage, losing your transformation, and forcing you to fight for one update in a weakened state
- STATS: https://questden.org/wiki/Tension_Stats

1. REROLL
- You will fight while de-transformed for the UPDATE
- There is an additional +40% chance of suffering a penalty if you do this
2. FIGHT AS IS
- You will fight with what you have, who knows if you'll roll a 1 next time!
- No penalty or bonus for taking this action

B1!

A, 2.

Just accept the fact that we probably won't get any eggs, and we can't do this on our own. At the very least, the cavern with the markings is in once piece, and we stunned some of the minions for the government as consolation.

B2. Her chance to hit you is at its lowest! Hopefully her shell stays cracked and the killing blow remains open, just in case you do de-transform.

>>1053856
>She lets out several shrill "shrieks", four short ones, a pause, a short one and a long one

That's Morse code for: HA. Probably a laugh because it found us.

A2! Call for backup, because the eggs and the other half of the queen aren't around to be detained anymore. Capturing this kaiju could be a big deal, we shouldn't give up on doing so.

>>1053857
B2

>>1053857
Since we no longer need to keep the generator on, we have access to all of our nanobots, instead of just a few of them. So let’s use them as much as possible!

B , 2
For our assault, we should have most of our nanobots swarm the False Right Queen and have them form into a bunch of drills and saw blades. The drills can start digging at [FRQ]’s head to try and crack the shell, while the saw blades aim for the joints, where [FRQ]’s armored shell is the weakest, to try and start cutting off limbs!

And while that’s happening, we make ourselves lighter, jump up, have our remaining nanobots form a spike around our legs, grow big and heavy, then drop down on the [FRQ]! Hopefully our heavy weight and a spike around our legs will be enough to crack the [FRQ]’s armored shell.

>chance of taking 1 damage, no matter what
Then it’s a good thing we recently bought a medical upgrade for our Lair!

>>1053857
B2

I'd still like to do my idea of picking up 2 minecarts and holding them in our hands to use them like boxing gloves.

>>1053857
B2

>>1053953
>minecart boxing gloves
Could we do this and add our nanobots onto the front and form them into several large spikes? That way we can punch with metal boxing gloves with large spikes on them!

>>1053917
>>1053966
If we decide to attack, do both these. Also, see about turning big too so our nanobots grow as well for more damage, and to keep the queen more distracted.

And I'd like to add, now that we have all our nanobots not focusing on the generator, or any centiminions, go ahead and use ALL the nanobots we have against the queen to perform these actions, don't be afraid to go skirtless to do this. Hopefully using all our nanobots will be more effective in helping us succeed than when we had some of them power the generator or distract the minions.

>>1054001
Agreeing with this!

rolled 16 = 16

---

if(Roll >= 35) makeVulnerable(FRQ);

rolled 68 = 68

---

if(Roll <= 30) selfDamage(1);

rolled 1 = 1

---

EXECUTING CentiMinionSpawn(Random.Range(1,5));

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/17(Tue)18:04 No. 1054033 ID: 87e33c
File 167400744880.png - (12.83KB , 500x500 , p159.png )

> MINIBOSS - [FRQ] AND HER MINIONS
No time to worry about that, instead, you grab two of the minecarts, grow to a comfortable size, and cover them in nanobots. They quickly take the form of STUDDED MINECART BOXING GLOVES that glint from the light spread by the many fires in this cave. You take a step forward and the False Right Queen lolls her head at you, wrapping tightly around her clutch of eggs.

You: Round uh.... 3?
You: FIGHT!!!
FRQ: .. .-..
You: YOUR SCREECHING WILL NOT PROTECT YOU FROM MY FISTS!!!
You: Am I really talking to a centipede now…

You're nearly distracted by your own musings as a tail sweep arcs towards your legs. You leap into the air, dodging it with moments to spare.

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/17(Tue)18:04 No. 1054034 ID: 87e33c
File 167400748461.png - (15.93KB , 500x500 , p160.png )

> MINIBOSS - [FRQ] AND HER MINIONS
The Kaiju's legs tap steadily against the ground as it writhes and swipes, remaining a fervent protector of the eggs. You mix light and heavy steps into your motions, reducing and enhancing your weight to keep away from its feral movements and serrating legs. This keeps the Kaiju on its toes and while it does release some of that weird sludge, it's only able to cover one of the eggs, adding ONE CENTIMINION to the fight. You lightly kick it to the side, far away from the fight, not heeding it any mind. No, your focus is on the boss.

You attempt to focus your punches on one point, on a certain joint, even shifting and vibrating your nanobots to create some sort of pseudo drill or saw blade. You get into a zen-state as time passes and you're NOT able to create a LETHAL VULNERABILITY, however, you think that you're starting to wear on the beast. This fight has been going for too long, and while you only just feel warmed up due to your CONSOLIDATED GAINS, you think that this Kaiju may not have enough energy left in them to keep going much longer.

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/17(Tue)18:07 No. 1054036 ID: 87e33c
File 167400762825.png - (12.02KB , 500x500 , p161.png )

> MINIBOSS - [FRQ] AND HER MINIONS
Your strikes are seeming to have little effect on damaging the creature, probably because you suck at using these makeshift weapons. But that may not matter as the Kaiju's movements start to slow, not to a crawl, but enough that it benefits you. The cavern is starting to get a little warm from all the fires, and you think you remember reading something about how insects tend to OVERHEAT since they cannot sweat. Maybe that explosion was a good thing and you'll just exhaust this thing out.

But then it shifts, leaving the clutch of eggs for the first time since it split. The giant Kaiju starts to shift towards a deeper tunnel, but you cut off its path to retreat. Seeing that it can't escape that way, the FALSE RIGHT QUEEN turns towards one of the crispy CENTIMINIONS that combusted earlier, opens its maw, and shoots a lance from its mouth. The lance is connected by some sort of disgusting intestine-like tube, so you sever it with a punch. The Kaiju looks at you with malice, but there's no way you're just letting it EAT in front of you. It could EVOLVE or REGAIN STAMINA.

The LONE CENTIMINION and FALSE RIGHT QUEEN regroup, you don't like the looks of it, and think they might TRY TO MAKE A BREAK FOR IT. How much will you sacrifice to prevent their escape

A. LEAVE NOTHING TO CHANCE
- The Eggs are preserved, no Centiminions will escape, and this FALSE RIGHT QUEEN will be captured.
- Lose [3 HEALTH]
- Successfully KO the CENTIMINIONS, [FRQ], and protect the remaining eggs
B. ONE GOT AWAY (AGAIN)
- The CENTIMINION will attempt to escape after consuming the remaining EGGS, but the FALSE RIGHT QUEEN will be captured
- Lose [2 HEALTH]
- Successfully KO the [FRQ], but the last CENTIMINION will flee back to PARADISO, giving the Kaiju INTEL on your capabilities
C. [GAMBLE] WITH YOUR LIFE
- Maybe... Maybe you can make it all happen...
- Roll three times
- [ROLL 1] 35% chance the FALSE RIGHT QUEEN will escape
- [ROLL 2] 35% chance the EGGS will be damaged
- [ROLL 3] 35% chance the the lone CENTIMINION will escape
- For every failed roll past the first, take [1 HEALTH] of damage

A. we can take the 3 hp loss, especially since we now have a medical facility that we're immediately going to rest up in afterwards at during a downtime. Thats what we bought it for. Best take advantage of it.

We are going to need to make sure to have the eggs for research, the queen captured to prevent another summoning for a while, and a minion captured to prevent another summoner from getting out for the government to greatly help us later. And after all our bad rolls, I'm not taking anything to chance. The Government is expecting results from us after we ditched the mission after all. This is the best we can do.

Be the hero!


(But afterwards, thinking ahead after we rest I recommend we also need to see about getting help in battle during another downtime, like training Saba and Josephine on Arcane Focus Creation in LYST.)

C. We're on interesting terms with lady luck right now, and I want to see how our rolls will play out.

The only really bad option of this bunch is if the FRQ escapes really. If the eggs get smashed, oh well. If the Centiminion escapes, that's manageable. Honestly, if we just hit one of any of these, even FRQ escape, I think we'll be fine. If we hit two, that's not great, and on three then we're officially on a bad luck streak (if the repeated 2s haven't confirmed it already).

I don't think we should do A. We can't push ourselves that hard all the time, it's just not healthy. Yes, we can spend our free time resting up, but at that point even our free time becomes part of the job. There are things Hailey probably wants to do outside of just resting in bed to recover from her injuries.

Pick the lighter option, hope you roll well, but don't beat yourself up if you can't achieve all your goals. You're just one person, you have limits.

A. Leave nothing to chance.

>>1054036
A. We'll be making the most out of that hospital...

A

A. You must take no chances. Think of the puppies.

>>1054042
1) There's a chance her friends will visit her during her stint at the ward.

2) Having no personal life sucks, but so does having to (in theory) explain to a pack of puppies why they're homeless. Failure would've been easier to swallow if it weren't for the latter. Heroic guilt is a bitch like that.

Wait a minute:
the first of the Kaiju's morse code was "four short ones, a pause, a short one and a long one
" translating in morse code to HA

this time, it said ".. .-.. " Translating to IL

together, they say HAIL...
I think it's trying to say Hailey's name. if it says ". -.--" next, then it's confirmed. How would it know Hailey's name tho? Too bad Hailey doesn't know morse code, but we will need to have the researchers tranlate what it says next time.

Keep in mind, it saw us without our tension suit right before it started morse coding. So somehow, it may have recognized us as Hailey.

>>1054036
>you think you remember reading something about how insects tend to OVERHEAT since they cannot sweat.
……you know, for someone who claims to have gotten a better memory ever since getting superpowers, you really suck at remembering an important insect fact while fighting an insect enemy! If you remembered that sooner, then you could've just shoved these enemies into the flames to weaken them earlier in the fight!

>choice
A
With the constant low rolls on your transformations and how nothing seems to be working out during this fight, you must be getting pretty frustrated, right? Then use that! Turn your anger into a weapon! Unleash thy wrath and start beating the shit out of the enemies!

Just because you're going to KO them, that doesn't mean you have to be gentle about it! Beat them so badly that they need to make dice rolls to not die!

>>1054036
>opens its maw, and shoots a lance from its mouth. The lance is connected by some sort of disgusting intestine-like tube
I believe you just found the thing that impaled those other kin and turned them to stone! Good thing you destroyed it's tongue thingy!

>what do?
Choose A.

This is going to hurt like hell, but you'll be able to stop them from escaping!

>>1054055
>Unleash thy wrath and start beating the shit out of the enemies!
I agree with this. Don't hold back and hit them as hard as possible!

I'm against hitting them so hard that they have to roll for death. It is possible that the queen can communicate through morse code, and might know who Hailey is somehow. If we accidentally kill it, the government may lose the chance to interrogate it for information.

Plus, we weren't able to make it vulnerable to a killing blow earlier. I don't think we'd be able to kill it if we tried, just knock her out.

>>1054036
Do not pick C! With how bad our luck has been recently, we’re gonna fail all of those!

I’m voting for A. We’re over capacity for monsters we can safely keep contained in our Lair and we’re risking a break out by trying to capture our current opponents, so it sucks that we don’t get an option to kill them.

And we definitely need to start on that Arcane Focus Creation stuff. If the government can get some magic wielding guys to come fight with us, then things might be a little easier next time (and hopefully we stop rolling low on our transformations).

>>1054108
>I'm against hitting them so hard that they have to roll for death.
This is a life or death situation. We don’t have the luxury to be gentle with them.

>We’re over capacity for monsters we can safely keep contained in our Lair and we’re risking a break out by trying to capture our current opponents

We should ask if we can eat the snake and kite kaiju later, I'm sure the scientists got enough research off of them for us to get rid of them for a little bit of exp.

rolled 4 = 4

---

TENSHIN (AGAIN)

EDMNGO - ID:0838d6 2023/01/19(Thu)21:58 No. 1054169 ID: 38349b
File 167419430591.png - (10.45KB , 500x500 , p162.png )

> MINIBOSS - [FRQ] AND HER MINIONS
You think of the puppies, those poor puppies from the orphanage that are now most definitely displaced due to the Kaiju uprising in the ACTIVITY ARCADIA. You think of your teammates who fought huge monsters without you, of the government who will probably be pissed at you. And you get angry.

Complaining about them breaking your near perfect record of defending the city doesn't accomplish anything, but it will make you feel good to take it out on these Kaiju that just… won't… die. So you do.

You kick the CENTIMINION into the wall, knocking it out and disturbing enough rocks to block the exit path.

You: BRING IT BUG!
FRQ: . -.--
You: YOUR SCRATCHES MEAN NOTHING TO ME!!!!
You: … Note to self, check out if that's morse code later.
You: Also figure out how the FUCK a Kaiju could learn morse code.

EDMNGO - ID:0838d6 2023/01/19(Thu)22:05 No. 1054175 ID: 38349b
File 167419473966.png - (13.82KB , 500x500 , p163.png )

> MINIBOSS - FIGHT COMPLETE
You become engrossed in an absolutely grueling fight. You're quickly knocked out of your suited form after a particularly nasty bite, but the adrenaline fueling through your body lets you shrug off the damage. It's incredibly difficult to keep the FALSE RIGHT QUEEN in place and so you do the only thing you can think of to keep it here. You let it think that it's winning, you let it hit you some more, and it works.

Even in your adrenaline filled state you can tell that moving stings, you ache all over. The arena looks like the bloodiest boxing ring you've ever seen, blood caking the floor and streaking from your body from visceral jagged gashes that cover your arms, legs, and one stray shot at your belly.

You've lost [3 HEALTH]
- It hurts to move
- Your body is covered in many visible wounds

But the great news is that after all of the PAIN, and after all of the BLOOD LOSS, the FALSE RIGHT QUEEN isn't looking so hot either. It doesn't have enough energy to escape, and although it's locked down tight, preventing you from performing a FINISHING BLOW, it' lost most of its mobility out of sheer exhaustion.

You transform once more, rolling a middling [4], but it's enough. You eat one of the crispy Kaiju and get to work tying the FALSE RIGHT QUEEN into a knotted ball. It won't be able to untangle itself without some choice amputation or the assistance of something REALLY BIG. You gather up the remaining CENTIMINIONS and do the same to them, bundling the living ones into a ball and tossing the dead ones into a corner.

And then, only after you confirm that the eggs aren't hatching, and that there's no surprises remaining, do you collapse to the ground, de-transform, and check back in with your squad.

EDMNGO - ID:0838d6 2023/01/19(Thu)22:05 No. 1054176 ID: 38349b
File 167419475855.png - (14.46KB , 500x500 , p164.png )

> ABANDONED POWERSTATION - SUMMONER'S CAVERN
You: Yo, Tear or whatever my codename was, here with-
Comms: ABOUT DAMN TIME, YOU BETTER-
You: Stop.
You: Come to my coordinates.
Comms: WE WERE ALREADY-
You: Less yelling, migraine
Sponge: Uh, you alright there?
You: Oh, you know, just took down a nest of centipede monsters
You: CAPTURED a thing that was breeding Kaiju under the city
You: Also CAPTURED a bunch of Minion sized Kaiju
You: Bleeding out on the floor
You: Oh, and there's a bunch of BODIES that probably need to be studied
You: and EGGS, did I mention EGGS?!?!
You: And goddess knows what else
Sponge: Holy shit this cavern is massive!

You tilt your head slightly to the side, only to see Sponge/Josephine and your guards descending down a path right next to the EGGS. You let out a groan and they rush over to you.

EDMNGO - ID:0838d6 2023/01/19(Thu)22:06 No. 1054177 ID: 38349b
File 167419477165.png - (13.30KB , 500x500 , p165.png )

> ABANDONED POWERSTATION - SUMMONER'S CAVERN
Sponge: Man down, man down!
You: It's just blood, man
You: Gimme a transfusion or something later
Sponge: There is literally more blood here than is physically kept inside of a normal body!!!
You: Quieter, migraine time.
Guard: Definitely not going to be enough room at the base for all this
You: Just shove the CENTIMINIONS in some jail cells with foam or whatever
You: They're weak as shit
Guard: But then there's all the Kellpo and the two weird things we fought
You: Mmmm can we pretend we're talking about hot stapler-men
Guard: These "Hot Stapler Men" did some real damage with their LONG LEGS
Sponge: Don't forget the WEIRD BULBOUS BODIES
You: Ew, fantasy ruined
Sponge: But seriously, we're beyond capacity here
You: Wow, sounds like a great problem for the government to deal with
You: All the Kaiju they could ever want!
You: Maybe they'll invest in their own storage space instead of pretending it's a reward for me
Comms: Definitely a concussion.

You let out a groan and sit up just as some medics round the corner with a stretcher. You could probably fake it just a bit longer till you get home if you needed to, but you're just so tired. You take the offered seat and ride the stretcher up until you can hear the sound two kin in a heated debate, it… must be an adoring fan and Phyllis!!! Here to see you after you saved the day! You can't lay on this stretcher now, letting them know their HERO is weak. You try to sit up but are lightly pushed down.

Medic: Concussion.
Medic: Stay down please.

You don't FEEL like you have one, but you feel like you could probably transform again if you really need to. The only frustrating part is that just your body and mind have been pushed to their limit.

A. PRETEND TO BE UNCONSCIOUS
- Secretly listen in on the full conversation
B. CONTINUE TO STRUGGLE
- Will give you a chance to interject in whatever is being discussed
C. DO SOMETHING ELSE
- You could say or do something else as you go up

A

B. Never stop never stopping. Who is your fan?

C, for go to sleep.
We can talk about Morse-code using mainly another time. Maybe test if the two-head snake knows it like the centipedes do.

C. Just sleep. You've earned it, hero.

don't worry about the adoring fan seeing their hero being weak, remember: you're NOT in suit. They'll just see you as a civilian who got caught in the crossfire, and Phyllis can let them deal with the fan.

A, there is literally no benefit to going to sleep right now, you just don't get to hear the conversation. That "Adoring Fan" is probably just another member of the government if they're talking to Phyllis (Plus, we were just in the fuckin' sewers, so how would our fan know to be here?). Listen to what they're saying.

Changing my vote to A

>>1054175
>You transform once more, rolling a middling [4], but it's enough.
Forget about it being middling, just be happy you finally rolled higher than a 2!

>>1054177
>There is literally more blood here than is physically kept inside of a normal body!!!
Most of it probably belongs to the kaiju. Or if it is your blood, then apparently superpowers give you more blood for some strange reason.

>two weird things we fought
>did some real damage with their LONG LEGS
>Don't forget the WEIRD BULBOUS BODIES
Now I wanna know what they fought against. And don’t worry about the damages, we can donate some money to fix it up.

>you can hear the sound two kin in a heated debate, it…must be an adoring fan and Phyllis!!!
Doubtful it’s a fan. It’s probably one of the higher ups wanting to chew you out for running off on your own and Phyllis is trying to stop them.

>you feel like you could probably transform again if you really need to.
With how bad your luck has been recently? You might just destroy your clothes again. Better not risk it.

You should just lie back and do A. Let’s listen in on what’s being said.

>>1054177
A

C) Freak out at the impending horror of being drastically bedridden for a whole intermission:
"NOOO I can't do No Nut [month], I don't wanna, please! You there! Suck me off through the medical procedure!"

>>1054177
A sounds like the best option.

EDMNGO - ID:0838d6 2023/01/23(Mon)19:36 No. 1054563 ID: 38349b
File 167453137794.png - (13.25KB , 500x500 , p166.png )

> CONCRETE JUNGLE - ABANDONED POWER STATION EXTERIOR
You let out a groan as the medic pushes you lightly but firmly down, you stop resisting their efforts and shut your eyes for a moment, focusing on the conversation.

Phyllis: -ore casualties if she didn't-
???: She's completely out of line!
???: We don't pay her to just let her go AWOL
Phyllis: You're missing the point, things would have been WORSE if she didn-
???: Didn't what? Follow another one of her INSANE HUNCHES?
Phyllis: You mean the same ones that let her pinpoint Kaiju with surgical precision?
???: It's either a case of complete randomness
???: OR, she's the one who BRINGS the THINGS here
???: Watch, I bet she's gonna be pulled out of there pretending it's fucking fine
???: Saving the day, resting on her fat fucking laurels
Phyllis: Uh huh, just ignore the TRAINING, RESOURCES, and LACK OF FREE TIME

EDMNGO - ID:0838d6 2023/01/23(Mon)19:36 No. 1054564 ID: 38349b
File 167453139192.png - (9.85KB , 500x500 , p167.png )

> CONCRETE JUNGLE - ABANDONED POWER STATION EXTERIOR
You don't open your eyes as you feel the warmth of the sun on your flesh and metal head. The two are silent for a moment, before you hear Phyllis's smug response.

Phyllis: You were saying
???: Uh... that's a lot of blood
Phyllis: She's not like you, never has been
Phyllis: This isn't about capital interests, investments, or the like
Phyllis: She SACRIFICES for us
Phyllis: Imagine if the GUARDS went in when the things in there left her like THAT
Phyllis: It'd be like the Midland Insurgencies all over again
Phyllis: We'd be lucky to get even ONE survivor, AGAIN!
???: ...
???: It's still not her call on where to send her guards
Phyllis: And yet her direction WORKED and managed to give us such good PR
???: That's OUR job, not yours are you trying to-
Phyllis: Fuck off Knee, you couldn't pay me to take your job
Phyllis: I've rejected the position dozens of times anyway
???: And yet you're somehow still hanging around…

You open your eyes a peek and spot the form of that same very angry turtle in a snazzy military outfit that you remember seeing shout at Phyllis before. His name is WAKE KNEE, and while you've never heard what his actual rank was, you imagine that he's significantly high up the chain if he's able to treat Phyllis like this.

EDMNGO - ID:0838d6 2023/01/23(Mon)19:40 No. 1054568 ID: 38349b
File 167453165324.png - (12.36KB , 500x500 , p168.png )

> MISSION 2 - COMPLETE
Phyllis: You're not going to be able to strong arm her this times
Knee: Pfff, as if, we'll just offer the minimum reward to grease things as normal
Phyllis: You might want to rethink that
Phyllis: he's been not so quietly simmering on your self-serving "rewards"
Phyllis: Or, you know, do, and I can certainly let some parties know about-
Knee: You wouldn't!
Phyllis: I may not, however there are plenty of Kin who would
Phyllis: Whom I'm sure you know well enough!
Knee: God you're such a bitch Phyllis
Knee: I liked you better when you were a recruit
Phyllis: I liked me better back then too...

You're not able to hear the rest of the conversation as you feel yourself actually start to fall asleep. You wonder just exactly what Phyllis did in the past, and how she'd wield this much influence.

You're put in an ambulance and driven back to the lair, where you can feel the fatigue leave your body, the mission is finally over.

GOVERNMENT PASSIVE INCOME (+ DONNA BONUS)
+ 3 Funds
MISSION 2 COMMANDS
+ Passed one command
+ Failed one command
+ No bonuses
THE KAIJU SUMMONER [MISSION 3] EARLY COMPLETION
+ An EVENT will occur with the higher ups in the government during the next intermission
MULTIPLE SPECIMENS CAPTURED
+ An EVENT will occur where you resolve the capacity limitation issues
GOVERNMENT PR ADJUSTMENT
+ 1 Heroism [3 Total] (from saving the boat houses)
+ 1 Visibility [2 Total] (from fighting at the docks)

> Your TENSION has maxed out, [2 CONSEQUENCES] will occur
> Your TENSION has been reset to 0
> [+1 Foe Objective] [1 total]
> The Kaiju have only barely made progress on their true objective
> [+1 City Stability Damage] [1 total]
> Kin are starting to be concerned now that they know that giant monsters are real

EDMNGO - ID:0838d6 2023/01/23(Mon)19:41 No. 1054569 ID: 38349b
File 167453166215.png - (11.43KB , 500x500 , p169.png )

> ??? - [PAZURU] THE HISTORIC PARASITE
You realize that it's not that the fatigue is leaving your body, but it's you. You find yourself in that DARK SPACE again, this time you appear right in front of [PAZURU] who is eyeing you with incredulity.

[PAZURU]: Welcome back, you statistical [ANOMALY]
You: I am pretty anomalous, thanks
[PAZURU]: Actually taking steps towards helping [ME] is appreciated as well
[PAZURU]: But I see that you continue to [SACRIFICE] yourself
[PAZURU]: One such as yourself should consider getting [AID]
You: I'm workin on it geez
[PAZURU]: I [HOPE] you do, before it's too [LATE]…

Something... feels different this time, something's off about [PAZURU], like she's been caught off guard, or maybe it's the space, or maybe it's you. Either way, you feel like maybe she likes you a bit more.

What do you do?

Ask about what cycles are, and that you saw someone at the bookstore holding a book about them, describe what bookstore owner looks like too, and the place's name. Pazuru might know. Weve been meaning to ask about cycles.

Also, let her know you found a cat body during that mission that the queen took the life out of, and if she wants it, we can see about one of our friends getting her that one when the scientists study the bodies... assuming she can use that one as a body (this one: >>1053175) might not be able to, but who knows, maybe magic will allow her to take that cat body despite its current state

Note to self: give Phyllis the perfect gift, she deserves it after speaking for us.

Okay, hear me out. Pazuru comes from LUST QUEST, right? That means she's probably one horny cat.

Have you considered soliciting Pazuru for funky magic void sex? Give it a try.

As for questions, I've got two.

1: Should we actually be calling you "Puzzle"?
2: Is there any way we can talk to you outside of you reaching out to us after every mission?

The space feels a little smaller, does it not?
Pull her into your lap and pet the the Pazuru.

>>1054563
>>1054564
>>1054568
>Phyllis standing up to the higher-ups for us
……you know what? I really want to give Phyllis The Perfect Gift now. She deserves it for standing up for us like that!

>>1054569
Ask Pazuru why she seems so surprised? Was she not expecting us to beat that centipede kaiju?

>One such as yourself should consider getting [AID]
Definitely need to do the Arcane Focus Creation to teach Saba and Josephine.

And if she's willing, we could politely ask Pazuru for aid. She might be able to teach us another technique.

There were a lot of moments where we could've used Telekinesis to make the previous fight a little easier for us. But we couldn't do any of that since a bunch of people insisted on pointlessly giving away that power!

>>1054569
>get yourself some aid before it's too late
It's like Pazuru said before, we're not alone, we have [CONFIDANTS]. And since she's one of them, let's ask if she can aid us.

Then ask Pazuru if there's some sort of significance to us beating the centipede? She seems surprised that we did that.

I think she's implying when she tells us about getting aid, she means "hey, give me a body already so I can [AID] you." I think that's the only real way she can aid us right now.

>>1054607
Having a body isn't the only way she can aid us. Remember: She can teach us magic, as stated here: >>1043732 . That's another type of aid she can provide, until she gets a body.

You know, as long as we don't mind being irradiated and increasing our chances of getting cancer from it.

Ask Pazuru if she wants any of the kins' bodies we found in the centipede kaiju's cavern.

>>1054569
Here's something to ask: Someone told us we'd need to go to the town of [LYST] after we create our Arcane Focus. Ask Pazuru if there's any kind of dangers to worry about in the town of [LYST] that would interfere with our attempts to use magic?

I'm sure that teaching Josephine magic would help with creating a body for her, since she told us to focus on getting Josephine's help for that.

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/27(Fri)18:41 No. 1054836 ID: 87e33c
File 167487370590.png - (7.39KB , 500x500 , p170.png )

> ??? - [PAZURU] THE HISTORIC PARASITE
You: We should have sex, casual sex
[PAZURU]: …
[PAZURU]: I don't have genitals, so good [LUCK] with that
You: Okay what about pats and scritches
[PAZURU]: Those [TERMS] are… [ACCEPTABLE]

You float over, cross your legs, and invite [PAZURU] into your lap. The sensation when she touches your ethereal body is somewhat reminiscent of the feeling of your leg falling asleep. She feels tingly, vague, and like you need to exert more pressure than normal to actually grasp her. You can't really hear her purr either, but you can feel the vibrations ever so slightly.

You: Soooooooo
[PAZURU]: Hmm?
You: Do I call you Puzzle?
[PAZURU]: That… is an [OLD] nickname
[PAZURU]: Perhaps if you finish making my [BODY] I shall [ALLOW] you to do so
You: It's a cute name!
[PAZURU]: I know

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/27(Fri)18:42 No. 1054838 ID: 87e33c
File 167487372444.png - (11.54KB , 500x500 , p171.png )

> ??? - [PAZURU] THE HISTORIC PARASITE
You: So, have you ever heard of Bookwyrms?
[PAZURU]: There are 48 different bookstores that go by that name, so yes
You: Uh, run by a dragon called Mint?
[PAZURU]: …
[PAZURU]: It's likely not the same [MINT] that I knew, but yes
You: Well she talked about [CYCLES] and I only ever heard you mention that
[PAZURU]: [CYCLES] are… context sensitive
[PAZURU]: Some [REDACTED] have ones of different length and times
[PAZURU]: Yours just happens to last a frustratingly long amount of time
You: So that means….
[PAZURU]: I've watched your universe get [REDACTED] too many times
You: See, I feel like I should be able to understand what you just said just from context
You: But those two words could be literally anything
[PAZURU]: *shrugs*
You: So why am I a statistical anomaly, just cause I beat up a big bug?
[PAZURU]: Hardly, more that you found them much faster than…
You: Go on… *scratch scratch scratch*

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/27(Fri)18:42 No. 1054839 ID: 87e33c
File 167487373848.png - (12.52KB , 500x500 , p172.png )

> ??? - [PAZURU] THE HISTORIC PARASITE
[PAZURU]: Well *ah* imagine a statistical chart of a single dice roll
[PAZURU]: It's not likely that it would consistently roll the same number
[PAZURU]: And yet it did, and poorly at that, and you committed even when it hurt you
[PAZURU]: You could have come back and fought it later, or gotten back up, etc.
[PAZURU]: One would have to be an [IDIOT] to do what you did, and an [IDIOT SAVANT] to win
You: Wow, rude
[PAZURU]: Some might say the odds were SO unlikely it's like you [CHEATED]
You: Rng bby, get rekt!
You: So it's a good thing I beat the snot out of the bugs right?
[PAZURU]: Good and bad are relative to emotional stimuli and situational factors
[PAZURU]: You just were… efficient in your methods, well, mostly
[PAZURU]: And well, it gets my [HOPES] up, when it shouldn't
You: Why not?
You: I'm here after all!
[PAZURU]: You'll never understand…

You want to argue, but feel like that would be a waste of your limited time here. In fact, you wonder about that and settle for a pout and knowing glare, squinting your eyes at her.

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/27(Fri)18:42 No. 1054840 ID: 87e33c
File 167487376127.png - (10.53KB , 500x500 , p173.png )

> ??? - [PAZURU] THE HISTORIC PARASITE
You: That reminds me, we found a bunch of bodies, want that cat shaped one?
[PAZURU]: Those [VESSELS] are too fragile and cannot be used
[PAZURU]: The [KAIJU] siphoned the [ENERGY] from them
[PAZURU]: That's why they're all gray and stone-like, they took their lives, their essence, their…
[PAZURU]: Their [POTENTIAL] to be anything other than they were
[PAZURU]: Honestly I wonder if it's even [LEGAL] for them to do that
You: Legal according to whom?
[PAZURU]: Suffice it to say, no, it won't work
[PAZURU]: It has to be either a [WILLING] or [CONSTRUCTED] vessel
You: You know, it would be easier to do this if I could see you more often
[PAZURU]: I doubt you'd want to hear me blather on all the time like some old crone
You: Maybe I could do that if I learned magic!
[PAZURU]: But you should ask yourself if you need to at this point
You: It's Magic [PAZURU]
[PAZURU]: That you would have to train and spend your [FREE TIME] on
You: I'll probably be stuck in the hospital for a bit, I can do both!
[PAZURU]: You know as well as I do that that's not how it works.

You exaggeratedly roll your eyes at her, she's so tsun, you, with your many years of sex training and body language reading can totally tell that she's enjoying the attention. Maybe all the isolation has gotten to her and she just needs that extra push! But then again, learning magic could be really useful, but you get the feeling that you probably won't be able to reach her until the end of the next mission if you ask.

A. GET [PAZURU] TO FOLLOW YOU
- [PAZURU] will now follow you around
- [PAZURU] will provide "historical facts" when she feels like it, or is prompted
- You might not like the "facts" that she drops
B. GET [PAZURU] TO TEACH YOU MAGIC
- [PAZURU] will teach you magic
- [PAZURU] won't appear in front of you until the next mission
- You'll definitely get Irradiated [suffer a permanent health penalty]

Gee, one or the other? Well, let's get irradiated. That is how people get superpowers, right? We could always use more powers!

A. 100% A, this isn't even a question.

-More Pazuru!

-We can't afford the health loss with how frequently we throw care to the wind with regard to our life

-We already won't have much in the way of spare time during this rest period to practice, given that we have SO MUCH damage to heal up from.

-Magic would mean not having more Pazuru, which would suck, fuck that.

B. Health penalty? No big deal. Magic will prevent damage if it's at all useful.

A. it's like Hailey said here: >>1044003
>I’ve seen what too much of a good thing can do to a kin.

I think Pazuru also said we'd have to train our magic too, which won't give us time to heal and teach our allies Arcane Focus.

(edited)

I'm going with A mainly for time managing reasons, and to have Pazuru follow us along to help.

After getting hurt the previous two missions, with this one having us lose three points, and Pazuru saying things are going to get worse during one of our previous meetings with her, I don't think the Health penalty just for magic is a good idea. Especially since we already lost four out of eight health, with resting only giving us two health back during downtime, and we already got superpowers that we're already leveling up.

Also, with the limited amount of downtime we have in mind, I think it might be better to let our friends learn magic instead so that we'll have more firepower on our side in battle instead of having magic for ourself that we'd have to spend some downtime training when we could be doing other stuff with our downtime, like finding Pazuru a body. Plus, remember, we already have Josephine and Saba willing to learn magic to help us in battle. Focusing on giving our friends magic instead of getting ourself irradiated for magic and fighting alone being the only one with powers that we'd have to train should help us better in the long run, especially with us already with growing powers, and nanobots.

overall, Lets focus on leveling our size and nanobots up and not focus on another thing we'll need to level up when we have friends that can train themselves in to help us out.

Lets not try to do everything ourseleves, especially if it means harming ourself to do thme. We have our friends that want to help.

Also, we'll have Pazuru, another ally on our side guiding us. She can help teach us stuff, alert us of danger, and she can help us help her find a suitable body for her. And most importantly, her bluntness, judging, and nagging can lead to some funny moments with Hailey's silly or lewd moments, especially when Hailey is the only one who can hear her..

A.

Better to focus on our already-gained powers, than try to take one rank in everything and then get our collective ass whooped.

Plus. Kitty!

>>1054840
A

>>1054876
>leveling our size and nanobots up
It's gonna be difficult to level up size because of how advanced it already is and we don't have a specialized trainer to help us with that. And we can't level up nanobots by training, we'd need the scientists to do surgery on us to improve them, as shown here: >>1049504 , which involves dice rolls and paying money to decrease the chances of them messing up and hurting us.

Of course, there are Lair Upgrades that can help with reducing the chance of injury for the upgrading nanobots surgery, as shown here: >>1050780 , but odds are, we'd have to pay for that ourselves, since the higher-ups in the government want to be stingy with things like that.

However, I don't want use money to get that Lair Upgrade yet. I want to donate it to heal the city, and as shown here: >>1046204 , doing that won't use up an action. So we can help heal the city and still get to do another action!

>>1054840
A

Be nice when she starts providing those "historical facts". She hasn't had anyone to talk to for a long time, so she might do a lot talking.

And, yes, you're going to tell your friends about being able to see Pazuru more often now. Preferably in that room where Phyllis could completely block out anyone listening in.

A) Do not irradiate yourself.
You have an entire R&D team. Incompetent they may be, but they're not the ones who would go out into public spewing radiation everywhere.

A!

>>1054840
A

Also, you ended up getting a little chonky from eating just one kaiju last time and this time you ate a little more than that. I hope you still have clothes that'll fit!

>>1054840
A seems to be the best option.

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/30(Mon)18:50 No. 1055030 ID: 87e33c
File 167513345483.png - (13.69KB , 500x500 , p174.png )

> ??? - [PAZURU] THE HISTORIC PARASITE
You: I'd like one blather sphinx please!
You: It must be boring not having anykin to talk to!
[PAZURU]: You get used to it after the first eon
[PAZURU]: [SANITY] is truly quite burdensome in that regard
You: Uh, you don't seem insane
[PAZURU]: I told you that I wanted to die in our first meeting
You: Lots of sane people feel that way, have you seen the internet?
[PAZURU]: ... fair point...
[PAZURU]: Guess I can watch the [HAILEY MARY SHOW] for a bit
You: Hell yeah, don't steal my thunder though
[PAZURU]: Me, steal your thunder?
[PAZURU]: Did you forget that only you could see me?
You: Oh right, well... don't let me steal your thunder then!

You watch [PAZURU] roll her eyes at you as a small grin tugs at her lip. And this time, when you abruptly wake up, [PAZURU] is there, sitting on your lap. You look around, to the right of your bed, finding yourself inside of your MEDICAL SEX DUNGEON, hooked up to blood bags, a saline drip, a bedpan, and restraints.

You: Yup, definitely the right choice, I feel so cozy here.
You: Kinda kinky that I'm already tied down though.
Alberta: That's cause otherwise you'd get up and do something else

Null{edmngo} 2023/01/30(Mon)18:51 No. 1055031 ID: 87e33c
File 167513348923.png - (14.94KB , 500x500 , p175.png )

> MEDICAL SEX DUNGEON - YOUR BED
You turn your head to the other side of the bed, spotting a very disheveled and puffy eyed Alberta.

You: That's cause I'm fiiiiiiiine!
Alberta: You've lost SO much blood man
Alberta: And carved up like a butchered pig!!
Alberta: They're putting you under medical lockdown for [1 DOWNTIME ACTIVITY]
You: Boooooooooo
You: Booooooooooooooooo
You: What about teaching them how to make the [ARCANE FOCUSES]?
Alberta: Hailey, please
You: Ughhh fine
Alberta: Good because otherwise you'd have to do a ton of paperwork
Alberta: The higher ups want to see you too
Alberta: Take your rest when you can get it!
[PAZURU]: Alberta has two bullets inside of her at all times
[PAZURU]: The first was from a firing range training accident
[PAZURU]: The second is to distract her from her skin condition via pleasure
You: *COUGH* WHAT?!?
You: You have a vibrator in you right now?!
Alberta: Did you get another superpower through that concussion?
Alberta: It gave you X-Ray vision, didn't it Hailey.

You get the distinct feeling that you're soon going to know the most intimate details about many of your friends and coworkers. The thought fills you with a [LUSTFUL] feeling, awesome!

[TENSION - END OF SEASON 1]
- TO BE CONTINUED IN SEASON 2
- THANK YOU FOR READING

>>1055031
>Random horny commentary

Pazuru is officially the best character.

When I said I'd take a bullet for you I didn't mean it like that

>>1055031
You're gonna have to learn to control those outbursts, so that you don’t say those things out loud and in public!

But with these random facts, we might learn something we can use in battle against the kaijus!