Trout 2013/10/08(Tue)14:49 No. 543411 ID: 52c28e
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What?

>>543411
Say "uh, that's mine."

Take the bottle of homemade maple syrup conveniently in your left pocket and squirt him in the eyes!

>>543411
Compliment him on his glorious mustache.

Make a joke about how short he is.

Compliment his glorious moustache and point out how Italian moustaches are better than German ones. Your goal is to make him talk long enough to refuel your vehicle.

Compliment his butt.

>>543488
>Compliment his butt.
>>543441
>Compliment him on his glorious mustache.

I support these, also:

>Complement him on his inspiring voice.

Compliment him on his country's fantastic beaches and women.

Trout 2014/04/20(Sun)19:10 No. 571763 ID: 8750b6
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>Butt.
What-- what?

>Take the bottle of homemade maple syrup conveniently in your left pocket and squirt him in the eyes!
Hey, I'm not THAT stereotypical, eh?

Besides, I left it in the passenger seat.

Trout 2014/04/20(Sun)19:11 No. 571764 ID: 8750b6
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>Moustache.
>Fantastic beaches and women
"Hey, uh, that's... that's a nice... moustache. Better than German ones!"
>"How well of you to notice!"
"And your country's great! It's awesome. I like the beaches, and the women, and all those other things Italy is famous for.
>"Yes, yes! I see the game you are trying to play, Allied spy! Flattery will get you nowhere!"
I didn't expect it to!

Trout 2014/04/20(Sun)19:11 No. 571766 ID: 8750b6
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>That's mine.
"Well, uh, that's my... thing. That's mine."
>"I KNEEEEEW IT! GIVE ME THE SECRETS OF YOUR ALLIED SUPERWEAPON OR I'LL MAKE YOUR LIFE ONE OF PUUUUUUURE PAIN

As threatened as I want to be, this guy's shorter than my baby nephew! It doesn't look like he's going to budge, though, and I'm pretty sure he was putting something on my whirlymagig!

>>571766
Punch him right in the eye and send him running, then see what the hell he put on your copter.

>>571766
Play mind games with him! accuse him of being a spy.

>>571788
Not just is he a spy, he's a REBEL SABOTEUR, harming the loyalist war effort by messing with the high-tech flying machine that is so important to our mission!

Grab his helmet and yell "Keep away!"

That's no superweapon, it's a really comfortable talking machine.

You're canadian, your people can't even do superweapons.

Alied superweapon? But that looks nothing like a Serogorg.

get ye flask

"Okay, okay, I'll show you how it works! Just don't hurt me!" Allow him to get into the whirlymagig. Once you get close, grab his helmet and stab him in the eye with it.

Say "Okay, stand back and I'll show you how it works." Then just fly off.

tiny or not, he's enough of a douche to warrant a shoving of your foot up his ass. I suggest you don't stop shoving until he starts to taste the leather.

Pick him up and do a little dance with him raised above your head.

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:35 No. 584081 ID: 18da89
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>Punch him right in the eye
>Grab his helmet and yell "Keep away!"
>grab his helmet and stab him in the eye with it.
>a shoving of your foot up his ass.

But he's... He's like a little fat kid! I mean, if you ignore the moustache, I guess, but still! I-I don't think I have it in me to do something like that! Damn-- dang my Canadian manners.

>Play mind games with him!
That, I can do! "How do I know YOU'RE not a spy, or even a saboteur, trying to steal Axis secrets away by posing as an officer?"
>"ARROGANT FFFFFOOL! I am GENERAL GRANDI BAFFI, face of the ENTIRE MILITARY MIGHT OF ITALY! I am even on this poster!"

He is on the poster.

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:35 No. 584082 ID: 18da89
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>see what the hell he put on your copter.
"Hey, uh, what is--"
>"THAT? That is a TRACKING DEVICE and also a BOMB. Yes, a BOMB. Don't look at it. It is a BOMB, I assure you, and it will go off if you look at it too long or do not do what I tell you to do! DO NOT THINK OTHERWISE."

"Uh... huh."

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:36 No. 584083 ID: 18da89
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>Say "Okay, stand back and I'll show you how it works." Then just fly off.

Oh, yeah, sometimes I forget it's a thing that can fly! I mean, it doesn't have wings or anything!

"Okay, okay, alright! I don't want to uh, be blown up today. By the bomb. I'll show you how it works and you can have it! Let me just put this gas in it. It runs on gas, see, like everything else!"
>"A-HA! Another Allied secret! Their vehicles run on gasoline!"

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:36 No. 584084 ID: 18da89
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"Okay, now, uh, just stand back a bit. For safety. Those spinny propeller bits go really fast."

He looks pleased as punch as I climb in. He's smiling wider than his moustache. It's actually really unnerving, all told!

>WILSONAI 1.0 ENABLED -- FUEL LEVEL AT 100%
>OBJECT DETECTED ON HULL -- SCANNING . . .
>OBJECT IS NOT A BOMB
>RE-ENGAGING PREVIOUS FLIGHTPATH
>SELF-IMPROVEMENT FIRMWARE DEVELOPMENT COMPLETE
>SUCCESSFULLY UPGRADED TO WILSONAI 1.1

I have no clue what a good part of that means.

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:36 No. 584085 ID: 18da89
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I don't get a chance to look at the look on the little guy's face before the whirlygig shoots up into the air and out over the streets of Italy. Hey, is that that one thing? The colluseum thing? Cool, I'm in Rome, I think!

Trout 2014/07/13(Sun)13:36 No. 584086 ID: 18da89
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>"AAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
SWEET MAPLE SYRUP!

Check the changelog on WILSONAI 1.1, maybe it has some useful new tricks for this sort of situation.

>>584086
Fly down near a roof and just sortof spin the helicopter around. He'll fall off eventually.

Mrs. Wilson's voice echoes:
Put on your seatbelt, young man!

Just let him inside before he gets hurt, then you just have to be yourself.
Being confined in the same vehicle with a Canadian... This kid will fall into a coma from the boredom and then he will be your POW.

He's outside, you're inside. Just... go where you need to go.

Ask him where he want to be dropped off... and no you shouldn't drop him from the air, that's just rude.

Fly so high he passed out and falls off due to oxygen deprivation in the upper atmosphere.

Seems we have a guest, open the door and offer him some toast, this thingy does have a toaster right?

Trout 2014/08/02(Sat)15:00 No. 587658 ID: 18da89
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>Put on your seatbelt, young man!
Done!

>Fly down near a roof and just sortof spin the helicopter around. He'll fall off eventually.
>Fly so high he passed out and falls off due to oxygen deprivation in the upper atmosphere.

It's flying itself and I don't know how to stop it!

>He's outside, you're inside.
I-I guess you're right-- No wait no he just opened the door!


>Just let him inside before he gets hurt, then you just have to be yourself.
>open the door and offer him some toast, this thingy does have a toaster right?

"Well, uh, hi-- I'd offer you something but this thing doesn't have a--"
>"SAVE YOUR USELESS PLATITUDES! NOW I HAVE TO KILL YOU."

MAPLE SYRUP! NOW!!!

>>587659
>>571763
Chekhov's Syrup all over his eyes and mustache!

Syrup, now! And if that doesn't work then shout at politely ask the machine to eject the intruder.

Can't you just kick him out?

>>587658
Bloody hell, moustache kid! hands and legs in the ride AT ALL TIMES! Wrap him up in seatbelts, show him how Canadians do proper safety!

Trout 2014/08/20(Wed)17:16 No. 590340 ID: 18da89
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>MAPLE SYRUP! NOW!!!
>Chekhov's Syrup all over his eyes and mustache!
>Syrup, now!

SYRUP

Trout 2014/08/20(Wed)17:17 No. 590341 ID: 18da89
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"AARERGRG"

It sticks his hands to his face and he goes spiraling out of the thing!

Oh gosh, I hope he's okay.

Trout 2014/08/20(Wed)17:17 No. 590342 ID: 18da89
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Okay, all fueled up and moving! Good to go, I guess! The whirlymagig is... flying itself, again. It said something earlier about getting an upgrade? How did it upgrade itself?

It seems like it's going northeast. What's in that direction? Bunch of European countries? Russia? Huh.

I wonder why this thing's doing the things it does!

Me too!

The whirlymagig works in mysterious ways.

You may want to take a nap; who knows when you'll get to sleep again once you arrive.

Ask it!

You should probably get rid of that not-bomb somehow, Grandi did let slip that it was a tracking device after all.